Sunday, May 27, 2012

Tissue Please

I've been wondering--debating--since last night whether I should post this, or not. If I do, I just don't know how to go about it. I don't know how vague or to the point I should be. For just one moment- this moment only- the guard is going to be let down. Because my heart is aching so badly, I just need to get it off my virtual chest. (Well, and literal chest, too).

I suppose, in a way, I'm mourning. Mourning the fact that there will be no more children in my future. But, I desperately want another baby. Its no secret. 3 was always my magic number. But, there it is. No more kids, and I'm having a supremely difficult time accepting it.

While I'm happy for the friends that have just found out they're having number 3 (or more), I keep wondering how many more {pregnancies} I'll find out that will just keep bringing the pain to the surface again. And, now the tears flow...

163* the precious two I already have
164* this blog
165* a wonderful chat with a wonderful friend
166* my deep freeze!!!!
167* the rest of my flowers are finally planted
168* pizza, for the nights I don't feel like cooking
169* their happy chatter when they wake in the mornings
170* another day

I have a couple layouts to share today:

This layout was inspired by sketch #140 over at Got Sketch?  While I was browsing through the mountains of patterned paper I have, I came across the green 'friends' paper. How fitting! Both items in the pictures were given to us by friends, so I thought it worked perfectly to help tell this story!

I decided to dry emboss using my cuttlebug to add some texture (with the script embossing folder)

and, I incorporated more stamping into this lo, too. I briefly thought about stamping the journalling spot onto another piece of paper, but it quickly got icksnayed (sp??) because...I was going to give a couple excuses, but the real reason is I was lazy!! HAHA

And, for some more visual interest, is some border punching! My favourite technique these days!

This next layout is based on May's sketch by Jill Sarginson (which I will be submitting to the site) over at Canadian Scrapbooker. This one was so simple, and a lot of fun to create. And, may I just say, I'm in love with it!!! I have to say, this paper pack is my new fave!! (Or, maybe its the colours together--or both!!)

Except for the yellow paper (which is card stock from Autumn Leaves--Wally world) and the beige card stock base (which is from DeSerres- don't know the brand or line), all the paper on this pack is from the Recollections "Elegance" line. It really is, isn't it?? Elegant, that is. And charming. And romantic. And, just plain yummy!!!!!!

I thought using twine would be a neat touch, to add just a bit more to the romantic, vintage flair...

In this corner, where the hearts reside, I had a stamp of a vintage postcard (that was matted a few times on different pieces of card stock and patterned paper), but I felt it was too bulky and top heavy, so I took it off- then had to find a creative way to cover up the mess I'd made from taking it off! The result was the two hearts, and this:

the border along the top added just a bit more charm to an already fabulous lo! I can't wait to submit this!

And, with the beginning of this blog post in mind, and how heavy my heart has been the last while, comes the title on this lo- 'heaven sent'. If these are the only angles I'm going to be blessed with, I had better take every chance I can get to love and cherish them...more than I already do!

So, I know Addison is the only one in this lo. Another will be coming of Maren shortly :)

(Ever have days where you swap out the picture you originally intended to scrapbook, then decided that you didn't like it, and wanted to scrap something else? Yeah, this was one of those moments). I may still use the picture I had intended to scrapbook, but I'll save it for another day. Cause, I'm sure it will come up again, whatever it was!


  1. I will keep you in my prayers, my friend. I always wanted a big family, too (4 at least! LOL!) but only had one child, by the grace of God! It was a painful time, but I worked throught it with the support of my wonderful husband and prayers. And you know, adoption is always an option. If you want to talk or have any questions, just send me a private post on facebook, my sweet friend.
    I love all of your newest pages, too!

  2. Big hugs to you, Alison. I know there are many moms out there who feel the same way or have gone through this in the past. Your new layouts are wonderful....and maybe you can design a page based on your feelings today too. Sometimes it helps to express emotions in a layout. xo